Posted by
the el·o·cu·tion·ist on Saturday, January 31, 2009 1:07:17 PM
Yeah, yeah, language is a living thing and all that, as such it evolves, or 'Darwinizes' if you must. I should think that would mean that when something new is discovered or produced, it shall be named. ipod comes to mind. And notice, even though it comes at the beginning of the sentence, it does't require capitalization for the same reason Coca Cola gets capital letters regardless where it comes in a sentence. I just made that up, but I'm probably right. Certain words are fairly well done evolving. Mostly they are nouns. An example would be; if a child pointed to a tree and called it a mountain, chances are they would be corrected: "No, that's a tree!".
If only it were that simple with adjectives and verbs. Of course, it's not. We learned that in first grade when someone called us a dweeb. Not really knowing what a dweeb was, and absolutely certain that the antagonist was dweebier than we were, chances are that we retorted with the classic 'same to you but more of it'. When the return came that he was rubber and you were glue, and what ever you said bounced off him and stuck to you, we were left with the dilema of where to go from there. The word 'escalate' probabaly didn't enter our vocabulary until some years later, so rather than straining our little mind for just the right word, we punched him in the nose. Things were simpler then.
Today, we deal in degrees of 'dweebocity'. An example; lets say I am at a dinner party, and I have just been served the best tasting chicken dish I have ever eaten, and I want to convey that to the cook. I could say, "that was the best tasting chicken I have ever eaten", but is that really enough? Wouldn't saying instead, "that chicken is to die for", be a higher compliment? After all, saying the chicken was the best you ever tasted is indeed heady praise, but don't you think the cook would rather hear that you would be willing to risk death for more chicken? But wait, the martyr thing is impressive, but would you 'kill for more chicken'? What if another guest also liked the chicken , and would be willing to destroy the entire universe for more chicken? Kind of leaves your compliment in the dust, huh? I mean, if any one deserves more chicken, I believe that the person who is willing to destroy the entire universe should get it. Don't you? It just makes sense.
This is kind of silly, isn't it? But if you read or listen to media, you have been hyperbolized. Our language doesn't just evolve, it morphs! A confused, upset, distraught hollywood starlet might be having a total meltdown, your favorite team could lose a game and suffer a crushing defeat, and yet in neither case was a life was lost, nor even serious injuries sustained. Hmmmm. Some one started this escalation, and if I could find him, I would punch him in the nose. No, wait! I would punch him in the nose so hard, it would destroy the entire universe.